Feature Article: Fall 2006
Got conflict? Deal with it!
The choice may be between conflict or lack of change—and ultimately death
by David Brubaker
On the fourth anniversary of his arrival as senior pastor at First Suburban Church, Pastor Roger decided that it was time to begin a more contemporary worship service. First Suburban is located in a steadily growing area that continues to attract new residents, and the congregation had grown by about 50 during his tenure, to some 250 active members.
True to his consultative leadership style, Pastor Roger did not attempt to push his idea through at the next meeting of the church board. Rather, he asked for the board’s endorsement to establish a committee to examine the current service and bring recommendations to the full board. The board endorsed the proposal, and, as expected, the committee reached the conclusion that a second, more contemporary service was needed. The major issue seemed to be the timing of the two services, but ultimately the board adopted the committee’s recommendation that the traditional service begin at 8:30 a.m. and the contemporary service at 11:00.
Changes in worship style and decision-making processes often cause conflict.
Within two months, the 11:00 contemporary service was up and running, and about 50 more people were coming to the later service than to the earlier one. The second service also seemed to be attracting new and more diverse visitors to the congregation.
Yet soon after the launch of the new service Pastor Roger began hearing from some of the lay leaders that not everyone was happy with the new arrangement. A number of the older members complained that the 8:30 start time for their preferred service was unreasonably early. Attendees at both services often commented that they missed seeing everyone at worship. And while the presence of visitors at the second service was encouraging, more than one member had commented that the newcomers “are not really the kind of people we’re used to having in our church.”
Fortunately, after the initial grumbling things calmed down considerably, and after six months with the new worship schedule Pastor Roger was convinced that the congregation had survived what could have become a destructive conflict.
Then one night the board chair informed Pastor Roger that he wanted to schedule a special meeting “to discuss concerns we’re hearing about your leadership.” Pastor Roger felt like he’d been kicked in the gut. Even though the new worship service was carefully planned and well implemented, there clearly was still conflict in the ranks. How had this happened?
Pastor Roger’s experience—while understandably surprising to him—is not that unusual. Of the 100 congregations in the southwestern United States that I surveyed last year, those that made changes to their decisionmaking structure or their worship service were significantly more likely to experience conflict and leadership turnover than those that didn’t.
Why can adding or changing a worship service cause so much conflict? One reason is that congregations make meaning with their worship; that is, they use worship to develop and express their central purposes. Since worship is the primary expression of a congregation’s culture, changes in the worship service can signal to congregants that deeper-level changes to the congregation’s core values and beliefs may also be underway. Thus “worship wars” are both understandable and predictable.
Like new worship styles, changes in decisionmaking structure can also cause conflict. And when the two happen at the same time, trouble is even more likely. Of the congregations I studied, seven out of ten congregations that went through both kinds of changes experienced a conflict.
While change can cause conflict, congregations that fail to adapt to a changing environment can risk their very survival. After studying 23 diverse congregations in the Chicago area, sociologist Penny Edgell Becker concluded that congregations that resisted making changes were “not likely to survive past the life spans of their current members.” In short, the choice may not be between “no conflict” and “conflict,” but between “no conflict and death” and “conflict and change.”
When necessary changes are being made, expect resistance, listen to it, and engage with it.
How can you initiate change in your congregation while simultaneously reducing the likelihood of destructive, high-intensity conflict?
1. Earn the right to lead change.
One of the things Pastor Roger did right in our hypothetical example was to wait about four years before initiating a new worship service. Unless there is a crisis or emergency, it is unusual and generally unwise for a leader to initiate major changes during the first year in leadership.
2. Plan the change process in a way that is consistent with the congregation’s culture.
If the congregational expectation is that a committee be established for every new initiative, set up a committee. If the congregational culture includes everyone voting on everything, put the motion to a congregational vote—even if the proposal is to change future decision-making processes. Encourage people to debate the merits of the proposal itself rather than fighting about whether or not the process is being carried out correctly.
3. Expect resistance and move toward it.
Regardless of the necessity of the proposed change or the appropriateness of the implementation process, significant change will always be resisted by some people in a congregational. Expect resistance, listen to it, and engage with it. Often the opponents of the change process have important insights buried in their critical comments. A nonanxious, listening response will unearth their insights while deescalating their emotions.
4. Manage your own anxiety.
Significant change always disrupts homeostasis, and such disruption is unsettling—especially to the more anxious members of a congregation. Some members will attempt to reduce their own anxiety by transmitting it to you; others will blame you for the changes that have created the uncertainty. Your ability to stay nonanxious will help the whole congregation to do so.
Successful change occurs when leaders are able to manage their own anxiety and continue to engage with the congregation in the midst of the uncertainty that accompanies every major change process. Managing conflict starts with managing oneself. If Pastor Roger wants to survive the pending focus on his leadership, he will need to maintain a nonanxious presence and engage the resistance.
David Brubaker teaches organizational studies at the Center for Justice and Peacebuilding of Eastern Mennonite University, Harrisonburg, Virginia. He is a member of Park View Mennonite Church in Harrisonburg.
