Tending Body Life
For deacons, elders, and others in caring
ministry and spritual leadership.
Sunday Morning as Prime-Time Caregiving
By Anne Stuckey
If they haven't been renovated out of existence, you can still see them.
Sitting at the front of the church to the side, perhaps on a low platform,
you may see short benches just waiting for important persons to occupy them.
They used to be called the "Amen" benches.
The task of the deacons who sat there was to affirm the words of the preacher.
A deacon who was asked to give a word of testimony after the preaching was also
to give a word of affirmation to the preacher. Giving support to the Word was
an important Sunday morning task of the deacon.
One Lancaster (Pa.) bishop tells the story of a deacon who was not given to
eloquent speech. Every time he was asked to respond to the sermon he would
say, "I agree with everything that the bishop has said and I want to add
my aye and amen." Then he would sit down, his deacon's work done.
By the time I joined the Mennonite Church in the 1970s,
these benches sat empty every Sunday, memorials to a former age. Sure, we dusted
them, but no one had the nerve to sit there on a Sunday morning.
Where are the deacons and elders?
Today, it is difficult to tell who are the deacons or elders in most congregations,
although in many African American and Hispanic churches the traditional Sunday
ministry of deacons is more visible. For the most part, however, these men
and women just seem to blend in with the gathering. They add their support
to the Sunday morning service by praying with the pastor before the service
or helping with Communion.
Lest we become too nostalgic for the "Amen" benches,
however, the deacon had another Sunday morning task that was perhaps even more
important: caring for the people in the pews. The deacon noticed who had been
absent from services for quite a few Sundays in a row or who was limping as the
people entered the church. Sunday morning was a time for the deacon to catch
up on the news of the gathered members and to hear of the needs that were there.
Increasingly, Sunday morning has become the most important
part of the week for the gathered church. Today we are a scattered church whose
members may only see each other on Sunday mornings and not throughout the week.
We no longer know each other's concerns and lives as we once did. Yet people
still hurt and are in need of care. More and more ministry, therefore, needs
to occur in the Sunday morning time frame than ever before.
The pastor cannot possibly meet everyone's need within
a three-hour block on Sunday mornings. It is therefore up to today's deacons
and elders (or other designated caregivers) to find out how congregational members
are doing through casual conversations and deliberate questions. Deacons and
elders become the eyes and ears of the congregation-to find out the stories of
God's people and provide appropriate pastoral care.
Since the passing of the "Amen" benches,
deacons and elders have tended to give up their ministry identity in favor
of a more administrative agenda.
Eyes, ears, and shoulders
If you are a deacon or elder, look carefully at people's eyes as they shake
hands after the service. You can often tell who is weary or who is troubled
by the way that they avoid your eyes or hold their shoulders. If you give
such souls an opening to talk, the story and pain often come tumbling out.
Many times these poeple just need to have someone hear and sympathize with
them in their difficulties. As a listener you don't need to fix their problem
unless they ask for help. This is hard to remember since we like everyone
to be happy and well and cared for. There are times when the best caring
is simply an attentive presence.
Deacons and elders must know clearly what they are to
do with information they hear. I suggest that a time for sharing specific congregational
needs should be a regular agenda item at each elder or deacon meeting. Confidentiality
is as essential in this task as it is when deciding how to use the Aid Fund.
The sharing time can be labeled "Congregational Concerns" in which
deacons or elders may:
1) Share the needs that have surfaced in conversations with congregational
members. Only firsthand reports should be discussed. Deacons and elders should
resolve not to report or act on secondhand information.
2) Pray, asking God how best to care for this need and shepherd God's people.
3) Discuss whether a need requires action or simply a listening ear. If the
group agrees that a response is necessary, then construct a plan for addressing
the need.
4) Report back to the congregational member through the elder/deacon who initially
brought the concern.
5) Designate one deacon or elder for long term follow up of the need.
Since the passing of the "Amen" benches, deacons and elders have
tended to give up their ministry identity in favor of a more administrative
agenda. It may be difficult for some to see themselves serving as care givers
and confidential listeners. However, a listening ministry is a real need
in a world that most often tells those who are hurting to be quiet and to
tough it out. Just as the blind beggar near Jericho was pushed back from
the road and told to be quiet by those in front of him, many who are hurting
today are also pushed away and silenced.
If we want to serve as Jesus served, we need only to
look at the Gospels and see how often Jesus asked those who were in pain, "What
do you want me to do for you?" (Luke.18:41). Jesus would ask all who are
in need today, "What do you want me to do for you?" And it is still
the listening heart in the congregation that asks the same question, hears the
answer, and serves the church.
For discussion:
How much of the agenda in your elder or deacon meeting is administrative work?
How many items concern membership issues, staff contracts, church conflicts?
By attending to these urgent matters, is your group shortchanging ministry
for the hurting and the needy? The loudest voices may seem to be urgent,
but ministry is more important. What would Jesus do?
Anne Stuckey is Associate Pastor at Zion Mennonite Church in Archbold, Ohio.